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Why Have You Abandoned Me?
Heal the pain of abandonment with the nurturing connection to the Spirit within
Why Have You Abandoned Me?
Discovering God's Presence When a Father Is Absent
Bestselling author Peter M. Kalellis offers an intimate look at troubled or distant relationships with parents—particularly fathers—and offers spiritual and therapeutic solutions for healing the wounds of abandonment and living a healthy, fulfilling life.
Drawn from case studies, his work as a Greek Orthodox priest, and his own experiences as a son and father, Kalellis’s examples range from instances of physical distance and emotional separation to total abandonment and untimely death. In each case he guides individuals to pursue a healthy resolution of their experiences.
Informing psychology with his signature compassion and forgiveness—for both self and family—Kalellis reveals how a strong belief in the Heavenly Father can help sons and daughters understand their earthly parents, while freeing themselves from the feelings of abandonment they might have carried from childhood into adulthood.
Each chapter is enlivened by inspiring quotes from literature and scripture. The book concludes with a series of invitations for personal meditation and further reflection.
“If you are a father, a son or a daughter, a wife, or a mother who, at one time, has felt abandoned, abused, or neglected by your father, this book is for you. As you read each chapter, you will feel enriched, and gradually you will realize that your life has been continuously protected by the one and only Father who loves you unconditionally. Regardless of your present emotional or physical condition, your Heavenly Father is present.”
—from the Prologue
1. The Problem Starts Early
2. Abandonment: Its Effects?
3. When Fathers are Absent
4. When Mothers Are Absent
5. In Search of a Loving Father
6. “Is There Someone Who Can Love Me?”
8. You Can Be Alone but Not Lonely
9. Solitude: Choosing to Be Alone
10. No Parent Is Perfect
11. Abandoned Parents
12. My Own Life as a Father
13. You Are a Creature of Love
14. You Can Be Reconciled
15. Intimacy With Jesus Christ
Reviews and endorsements
"Why Have You Abandoned Me? is like a mirror. The reader will be amazed to see himself or herself so clearly in the pages. The author helps us to move forward, unafraid, as we discover and learn the origins of our sensitive self which is easily hurt by being ignored or rejected. By recognizing failures or weaknesses of our upbringing, we can begin to understand how we are affected behaviorally and emotionally."
—Ernie Anastos, TV anchor, FOX News
“Why Have You Abandoned Me? is a book written by a seasoned therapist who addresses one of the most powerful influences in our lives: parents. With gentleness and wisdom, Dr. Kalellis clarifies how we have been programmed in a positive or negative way by close or distant parental influences and helps us to provide emotional and spiritual healing.”
—Maria Sikoutris Di Iorio, MA, Ed.S., LPC Director of The Hellenic Therapy Center
"No matter how old you are, your relationship with your parents or parental adults—whether it was wonderful or painful—has had an impact on the person you are today. Why Have You Abandoned Me? is one of those rare books with the power to reexamine and recreate your emotional life, presenting insightful and spiritual options—one that can comfortably change your life for the better."
—Demetria De Lia, Ph.D. Academy of Clinical and Applied Psychoanalysis